Sun King Party (Fete du Roi Soleil)

This is a party that needs a short history lesson beforehand. Louis XIV was the self-proclaimed "sun king" of France in the 17th and 18th Centuries. He is the epitome of absolute monarchy. He was born on September 5, 1638. He's the dude who built Versailles, and he's probably who you picture when you think of French kings. He had a bit of an ego problem, and he loved to party, but only with the finest things. He died on September 1, 1715.

The idea for this party takes advantage of the fact that Louis died five days previous to his birthday. These five days can be easily turned into the biggest, best, most luxurious party one can throw.

The theme should reflect Versailles palace. Think gold and silk. As fancy and classy as you can be, and don't worry about going overboard (Louis XIV never did, so why should you?).

Louis displaced the court and required the nobility to live with him at Versailles, and in order to accommodate his court at the palace, modern French cuisine was basically invented. Thus, any party commemorating the life of Louis needs to have haute cuisine. There need to be lots of dishes with sauces. A lot of desserts and delectable treats are also required. Making Marie Antoinette jokes by way of cake is also acceptable.

Putting on a Moliere play would also be wildly appropriate. Louis XIV also enjoyed, and loved to star in, ballets.

Costume dress isn't optional, it's required. Guests can come dressed in period costume, in formal wear, or dressed as their favorite French royalty. Dressing up as ambassadors from foreign courts is also a good option. Peasants should either not be allowed entrance or forced to be the servants for the party. Dressing as clergy is also appropriate, as Louis was a devout catholic. Also: the three musketeers. Heeled shoes are appropriate for women AND men.

There should probably be fountains. For historical accuracy, put them on a timer and have them go off as a sort of show for the party-goers.

Anything related to the musical "Le Roi Soleil" is acceptable for this party, since it is a musical about Louis XIV.

Decorations for the party should follow the elaborate rococo style, or neoclassical French style. Think Baroque.

Above all, be classy.

Best People Party

If there were one word to describe this party it would be classy.

First off, you would only invite the best and classiest people you know. Invites for this party cannot be done through texting, social networking websites, face-to-face conversations, or telephone. Invitations must be sent in envelopes with calligraphy writing at least two weeks in advance. The invitations should be as formal as possible. Instead of asking for an RSVP it might be easier to have a "regrets only" notation at the end.

Dress for the party should be semi-formal since that is both classy and comfortable.

Mocktails and hors d'oeuvres should be served. Mocktails because the classiest people would never drink cocktails. This is because classy people would never run the risk of getting drunk. Hor d'oeuvres because it's a classy French word. However, it should be noted that while some may consider foods like pigs-in-a-blanket hors d'oeuvres these are by no means classy. You must be picky when choosing which hors d'oeuvres to serve.

Here are classy hors d'oeuvres ideas.
Melon Prosciutto Skewers
Mushroom Polenta Diamonds
Shrimp Cocktail

If music is to be played at this party, it should be played softly in the background and be limited to music from the Romantic era. Soothing string quartets or orchestral pieces are best.

Activities at this party should include mixing and mingling only. This way classy people can make connections with other classy people. These connections should lead to future business partnerships, political gain, marriages, or all three.

Monday Party

Monday Party! Party on a Saturday like it's a Monday!

It's hard to contain one's excitement for a party like this.

It's pretty simple to put together, too. The theme is Monday, so think school or work. There are also the entertainment factors: Monday Night Football or Monday Night Raw. Dressing as if going to work or school is basically mandatory. Wearing a backpack is more than okay.

Party food should be appropriate to the theme. Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, on white, crustless bread and cut into triangles is one example. Snack food, especially individually wrapped, works well. Packing the food into brown paper bags or lunch boxes adds an extra touch. Punch, capri sun, and water bottles are good refreshments, as well.

The music should be Monday themed as well. "Manic Monday" is required, but also "I don't like Mondays," and "Rainy days and Mondays," etc.

The best part of the party is the optional t-shirt with "I love Monday" on the front and "F the weekend" on the back.

Skinless Party

The title is pretty self-explanatory so I'm tempted to not write a description. But here's the nitty gritty anyway:

No skin allowed. Guests must cover as much of their skin as possible. This can be done by wearing long pants, turtle necks, ski masks, veils, gloves, etc. The sky's the limit as long as the skin is covered. If things get a little creepy or uncomfortable, guests may remove items covering their faces. Note: I would encourage cranking up the air conditioning as guests may get uncomfortably warm with so much of their skin covered.

For food, everything must be skinless or peeled. For example, if you wanted to serve grapes, you must peel them first. If you wanted to serve chicken wings, they must be skinless. If soups are being served, they must be stirred frequently to prevent the skin forming at the top. No one likes soup skin anyway.

Activities at the party are endless as long as it doesn't involve showing skin. So, strip poker is definitely out. However, twister would be a great game to play since any sexual overtones of the game would be canceled out by the excessively modest clothing. This will allow even the most conservative guests to play the game, which they most likely have never done before.

Presidents' Day

This party would be ideal for Presidents' Day but it's good for any time of the year. Basically, you have every guest dress up as a president or first lady. Most Americans will assume you mean US Presidents or first ladies. But any president of any country, corporation, or group will do. It's also best if guests imitate certain personality traits or idiosyncrasies the president or first lady they are dressed as exhibited.

For food, you could prepare favorite foods of famous presidents. This would require some research but would be way worth it.

Most of the activity at the party would revolve around talking politics or about the responsibilities of a president. Then, maybe a dance party. Because the best way to relieve the stress of being a president is to dance.